Apple mishaps

I have been scavenging for apples for applesauce for the last few weeks and have found quite a few friends with trees they are willing to let me pick. I put up a bunch of juice and sauce last week, but since we eat an enormous amount of canned fruit and we were almost out of sauce, I decided to pick some more apples over the weekend.
For several years, we have considered getting an apple picker — a basket on a pole to help reach the higher apples — and on Saturday evening, we finally went to Greybull and bought one. I couldn’t wait to try it out, so Sunday we took it and some boxes to church with us and picked some apples off of the tree on the property next door to the church. (We do have permission to pick said tree!) Well, there I am, having the time of my life hooking apples and popping them off of the tree into the basket on the end of the pole when, all of a sudden, an apple free falls from the tree and bonks me right on the head, just above my right eye.
That brought back a memory from many years ago. I was an older teenager and my mom and I were picking apples at a place in Greybull. Of course, the best apples were higher up in the tree so I scaled the fence next to the tree to get those. At one point, I was standing on the top rail of the fence, balancing myself by holding onto one small branch of the apple tree (like that would have done any good had I fallen) and picking with the other hand. My mom was standing on the ground holding a bucket balanced on her hand as far above her head as she could reach. I would pick an apple and put it in the bucket. When her arm got tired she would empty the bucket into the box and come back for more. I stretched as far as I could reach for an exceptionally good looking apple, as soon as it came loose from the tree, another apple free fell from the branch and bonked my mom right in the middle of her forehead. She didn’t fall, but I nearly did. I felt horrible. We laughed later, but when we went to have lunch with my grandparents, everyone was asking why mom had a big bump on her forehead.
Well, after my bonk on Sunday, I know how she felt.
This morning, I threw some bad apples out for the chickens. One of the roosters was trying to get the hens to come over where I dumped them, so he talked to them and then pecked at one of the apples, but I think he misgauged his thrust because his beak went completely through the apple and was poking out the other side. The look on his face as he was trying to cluck with an apple stuck on his beak was hilarious. He kind of looked down his beak at it with a, “How did that happen?” expression, then he shook his head and the apple went flying off. After that, he continued on with his life.
The apples are plentiful this year, but next year may not be as good, so I am still scavenging, and making applesauce, and juice, and jam, and jelly. I might even pickle a few.

Tiny Pickled Crab Apples
6 cups apple cider vinegar
8 cups brown sugar, packed
2 teaspoons whole cloves
3 sticks cinnamon
8 pounds crab apples, washed, stems left on.
In a large, non-reactive pot, mix vinegar and sugar until brown sugar is dissolved. Bring to a boil, put cloves and cinnamon sticks in a cheesecloth bag and tie with a string. Remove from heat and let cool, add crab apples and bring slowly to a boil. Let stand overnight, pack apples into jars and boil down syrup to desired thickness. Pour over apples and process 10 minutes in boiling water bath.